serafaery: (darkfaery)
Look, the trees
are turning
their own bodies
into pillars

of light,
are giving off the rich
fragrance of cinnamon
and fulfillment,

the long tapers
of cattails
are bursting and floating away over
the blue shoulders

of the ponds,
and every pond,
no matter what its
name is, is

nameless now.
Every year
everything
I have ever learned

in my lifetime
leads back to this: the fires
and the black river of loss
whose other side

is salvation,
whose meaning
none of us will ever know.
To live in this world

you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it

against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go.


Mary Oliver
serafaery: (darkfaery)
This is really important, and really, truly courageous. Don't be scared.

serafaery: (darkfaery)
Narwals narwals swimmin in the ocean, causin a commotion, cause they are so awesome
serafaery: (darkfaery)
“A human being is part of a whole, called by us the ‘Universe’ —a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts, and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.”
-A. Einstein
serafaery: (darkfaery)
Groot and Maleficent reminded me to look for Varmints, again.



This is for me the most evocative film regarding what it feels like to be in this world, with this heart.
serafaery: (darkfaery)
Because of sexy slurp.



And for pouts and Tilda's fragile, perfectly vulnerable dancing.

serafaery: (darkfaery)
"How can you have lived for so long and still not get it? This self obsession is a waste of living. It could be spent on surviving things. Appreciating nature. Nurturing kindness and friendship. And dancing."



Found a new song for my mix.
serafaery: (satyr)


Just a pretty tango song.
serafaery: (satyr)
There's a "confess your unpopular opinions" hashtag on twitter.

I'm a childless-by-choice, socialist, pacifist, atheist/pagan, vegan-leaning philosopher. Pretty much all of my opinions are unpopular.
serafaery: (satyr)
TV is weird. So many mousy but tenatious professionally successful girls making watered down hiphop gestures in commercials.



I'm gunna clean the kitchen and finish laundry and bake cookies toooooooooo.

Maybe.
serafaery: (satyr)
Was feeling all perky after werk on 6 hrs of sleep and thought maybe I'd go to Marq's happy hour thing and then tango. But instead I took a nap, chatted with the boi (he got an awesome new job with United Way, so jelly), made popcorn with coconut oil and nooch and drank too much beer and lazed on the couch with the kitty. I have clearly made the superior choice.

Watched the "oh look I have a boyfriend" episode and now one I've never seen. yaaaaay :D
serafaery: (satyr)
"But a pawn in an unfortunate series of events saw those dreams dashed and divided like a million stars in the night sky that I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken. But I didn't really mind because I knew that it takes getting everything you wanted and then losing it to know what true freedom is...."

"There's no use in talking to people who have a home. They have no idea what it's like to seek safety in other people. For home to be wherever you lie your head."

serafaery: (satyr)
"You've suffered enough at war with yourself
It's time that you won.

Take this sinking boat, and point it home
We've still got time."

<3333333333333333333333333333333333

serafaery: (satyr)
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” — Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

(Always worth re-stating. So hard to find solace in those who haven't been through these depths, like chronic pain, or losing parents to cancer or addiction. There is nothing wrong with me, I don't need to be "fixed" for feeling pain or sadness - I need understanding and acceptance. To look suffering in eye, with no ability to change it, and not turn away, but keep love in your heart for me, despite the discomfort. To recognize and appreciate the strength it takes, sometimes, just to breathe. I don't look down on those who haven't been through these special layers of hell, but if you can't even hold my gaze, without telling me all the ways I need to change my perspective or sweep whatever's wrong under the rug with "positivity! gratitude! bootstrapping! look on the bright side!" then I can't trust you with my heart. Facing pain and being still within the suffering, accepting difficulty for what it is and honoring it, allowing tears to fall without judgement or disgust, without desperation to candy-coat it, is basic mature adult behavior.)
serafaery: (baltar sparkle)
"Now before this goes any further you should know that all forms of physical contact up to and including coitus are off the table." -Amy Farrah Fowler.

I think I should open with this on every date.

Sheldon meets Amy

(Big Bang Theory is a relatively stupid show with a really disturbing strain of sexist genderfail [as dear [livejournal.com profile] woolly_socks recently pointed out] but it has some very clever, fun dialogue, and Jim Parsons and Miyam Bialik are delightful to watch.)
serafaery: (satyr)


This is so helpful to me. I've watched it three times and want to start practicing lie spotting. Maybe in bars? Definitely in the office.

"The power of a lie emerges when someone agrees to be lied to."

"If you don't want to be deceived, you have to know: what is it that you're hungry for?"

"We all kinda wish we were better husbands, better wives, smarter, more powerful...."

Lying tries to bridge that gap between what we wish we were and what we're really like. "And boy are we willing to fill in those gaps with lies."

They will prey on what you're hungry for. They will sniff it out, and use it against you. To be aware of what you're hungry for is the first and best defense.

I was hungry for a committed relationship. I wanted to believe that I was special, that I was loved, that I was worthy of commitment and fidelity, that I was beautiful and lovable.

It is laughable to me now that I ever believed that he was my "boyfriend." That I ever genuinely believed that that was what was going on. I miss the open, loving, non-judgmental heart, before I was so thoroughly betrayed. The generosity of always offering the benefit of the doubt. The trust and belief in the goodness and honesty of others. But I don't miss the hapless gullibility.

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