something I wanted to post on social media but then thought better about.

[serafaery]

hey friends, wondering if there is a ladies book or art or knitting group that meets regularly and might have room for a newbie. my activity-based social bonds have collapsed due to early onset arthritis, now that I can't dance, skate, rock climb, or run. friends my age have no interest in meeting consistently as a group. I think because I lost my parents early, have no generational wealth or ties, and have no children, I am more like a 70 year old than a 50 year old, in many ways.

at my age, being childfree and parentless, with no house or inheritance, I feel like I am waiting for all of my 40-something friends to lose their parents before they realize that community is also important. very few of them will leave their homes to socialize, and my activity-based social groups have collapsed as I can no longer dance or do intense exercise with my early-onset arthritis. I feel like I am waiting for people to catch up, given the losses and trauma I've had to endure, and without religion or children or family, it's very difficult to construct meaning or a sense of belonging without a circle of women who are willing to meet regularly. I think this, along with my physical problems, are contributing significantly to my increased clinical depression symptoms, although I know menopause is also a factor.

Comments

[sylvanfae]

Zoom is great, and I also find Discord kind of esoteric. I never got tired of Zoom, I thought it was neat that the world was joining us geeks in online spaces with video chat. I liked attending online classes over Zoom. I was enjoying meeting with bartstationbard et al. for the Wild Druids meetings and rituals (I got pulled away by insanely stressful events that converged on me all at once, but have been meaning to go say hi to them again, especially since I now live in NorCal, too).

I have a sense that modern screen-life and it's attention drain has been making it harder for people to engage with each other consistently, which is weird because you'd think it would make it more convenient and right-in-pocket. But engaging is harder than just scrolling, and maybe we're all a bit burnt out. But I want to get the magical formula right. Community and the way that humans need other humans, even beyond just the family unit, is so important to me. I grew up in close-knit community, and I miss it so much. Life rings so hollow without it. You need the social fabric, or you're just an individual or small family, bare and cold.