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Josh is gone for the weekend. I had an epic migraine all day and had to cancel thriller practice. It hurt and then it hurt more, and then more, quite certain I would have been vomiting if I'd been able to eat more than a biscuit all day.

It still hurts a lot, but it finally eased up enough to let me make a box of shitty vegan mac.

I am hiding from my brother. Darwin is on my lap, purring loudly and waiting patiently for me to cook him his weekly meat feast. He's been with me all day, hasn't left my side except to eat and poop. Same as yesterday, with all the tears. He's a good caretaker.

Found some skating videos. Yuzu's first SP of the season was a stunner. He's using his old Chopin routine, slightly revamped. It was his best sp of the last four years, this will be his third season with it (he skated to Prince last year). I'm happy to see it again.

eta holy balls lookit what Shoma did. !!!

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I can't eat at Next Level Burger anymore, because for the second time, I ordered a shake for "here" with a spoon instead of a straw, and they gave it to me in a to-go cup with a plastic lid and straw. I consider disposable plastic to be a form of climate violence, as much as eating meat. A vegan restaurant isn't good enough if they're poisoning the environment with plastic even when their customers ask them not to for their order. I think it's time for me to evolve to only preparing my own food, and not eating out at all anymore. I'm almost there anyway. There will be more mistakes, it's still impossible to totally avoid plastic in this environment. but I need to try harder.
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Something that's been on my mind all day, so I looked it up.
"Every day [in the US], 93 people die from gun violence:
32 are murdered
58 die from suicide
1 killed unintentionally
1 killed by legal intervention
1 died but was intent unknown
Every day, 222 people are shot and survive:
164 injured in an attack
10 survive a suicide attempt
45 shot unintentionally
3 are shot in a legal intervention
What happened in Vegas happens in this country every day. It's just dispersed, so you don't notice. The US culture of devaluing life - capital punishment and for-profit healthcare, especially, not to mention lack of gun control - makes human life seem disposable to those without the privilege of proper de-programming, nurturing, and basic love and care.
These are my feels. So many sad. Much hurt. Very grieve.
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There have been dragonflies and lacewings gracing my back yard, as of late. Completely magical beings. So blest.
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Jun. 1st, 2017 10:37 pm
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New song I've been singing about my cat lately:

If you're Spoops and you don't know where to spoop to
why don't you go where Spoopers sits
Spoopin' on the Ritz


Jun. 1st, 2017 08:07 pm
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There was a pair of ravens circling happily on updrafts on my way to Lake Oswego today.

There was one swooshing around at Ecola when I was there at the coast two weekends ago, also.

Just saw an article that they're starting to move back into cities.

Makes one wonder.

They are sooooooo beautiful. I love seeing them. I still adore my crow friends, too. It's like the difference between coyotes and wolves, kinda. I adore them both, but wolves are another kind of magic.


So sick.

May. 28th, 2017 11:11 am
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Headache is severe enough to motivate me to get out of bed and find coffee. Sick from living in dirty house, I feel guilt for taking on all housework, and then getting too tired to keep up. How do you train men who don't care and can't think to even wash their hands before putting away clean dishes. Where do I start. Both of these men, my brother and my boyfriend, were raised by mothers over burdened with house care and cooking who worked as hard or harder than their husbands. At least I'm not having kids so I won't perpetuate it. This is too much, I am so ill, I lost a beautiful long weekend because they were coughing all over the house and I was working too much and couldn't disinfect fast enough.
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Impulse bought two giant hanging baskets at the farmers market because I can't keep up with daily refreshing the hummingbird nectar in the summer. I hope they like them. I'm sad that they are in plastic.

Fell ill, very grumpy. It's a beautiful day and I didn't have any parties booked, my friends are at naked beaches or other fun places. I'm on the couch with the cat and awakening videos on the YouTubes. Pineal gland activate!

Ps: can anyone see the photo in the post below? It's disturbing if all of my google photos are public, I actually hope you can't see it b/c of the way I linked it :/


May. 24th, 2017 04:38 pm
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cannon beach may 2017

Seeing if this werks.

Cannon Beach and Ecola State Park = favorite selfies

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Oh, I'd forgotten that I followed a random dw blog of some sort and it posed this question, today: What are you doing when you feel most beautiful?

I answered: I love this post and this question! When I feel most beautiful is when I am frolicking as a faery, doing my hair sparkling work, dancing, cuddling with people I love, aerial or figure skating makes me feel beautiful on good days, sitting on my favorite beach alone listening to waves, watching the sunset, making things, being kissed.

I would love to hear your answers. <3

This reminds me also that I started coloring in a coloring book and I very much want to get back to it. It feels like I have no time. But I do. If I can get off the freakin' internet for an hour. Today was kind of a fail, there. But I felt like there was so much I had to do, online today. Hard to manage that feeling, between necessary communication/promotion for work, and addiction.

Sophie is meowing at me from behind Shawn's door. Bedtime.

DW newbie

May. 1st, 2017 12:25 pm
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Heya, anyone old hat at Dreamwidth, can you tell me - I really miss the little mood kittens from the ole elljay, does DW have kittens if you get a paid account? Or any other themed moods? What about stickers?

How many icons can we get with a paid account?

I have some reading to do, to be sure.
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Re-posting this section from Dreamwidth News: just in case you're not following them:

Given the reasons most people are citing for not wanting to agree to LiveJournal's new ToS, I'd like to take a moment and ask: if you're able to (and only if you're able!), please consider donating to the Russian LGBT Network/Российская ЛГБТ-сеть. They not only do excellent work across the Russian Federation, but are currently mobilizing to help evacuate LGBT people in Chechnya who are in danger of detention or death. (EDIT: If you're outside Russia, you can donate through All Out; the Russian LGBT Network website won't accept donations from outside Russia.)

Team Thor

Feb. 15th, 2017 06:13 pm
serafaery: (darkfaery)
This is seriously the funniest thing I've seen in like, I dunno. I've watched it like 50 times I can't stop. Chris Hemsworth is soooooooooooo much more delicious than anyone should be wth. I can't.

serafaery: (darkfaery)
Stumbled upon a beautifully resonant article on the fookbase today, it felt like it was written by me in another voice, or something. It probably helps that she is also 41. Especially this part:

I have never felt more sensual, more attractive, creatively driven, at home in my skin, or more powerful in my life. Although it isn’t my path or my purpose to birth babies, I feel my body strong and productively capable for many years to come. My sexuality has reached a maturity and a way of expressing that is nothing short of exquisite.

I have developed an unsuspected ability to lead with grace, humility, and impact. With my hormonal and emotional systems settled in a new way, I have come into a whole new ability for balance, wisdom, giving, and service.

I see this also in those women around me who have recovered from the Aging Woman Syndrome. They are the women who have taken their power and bodies back from the invisible giant who makes them look tiny. They stand up much grander than the scared shadow of patriarchy, and are living on the leading edge of social change.

They have dropped the small talk and are holding this Earth in their arms, weaving a new basket for humanity and for those who come after us.

Article is here.
serafaery: (darkfaery)
I was 15 when Freedom '90 came out and for some reason, it sounds so corny and cheeseballs, but the line, "All we have to do now is take these lies and make them true" completely focused and oriented me toward becoming the person I wanted to be. Somehow that song helped me realize that I didn't have to just pretend to be somebody I wanted to be; I could actually make it happen.

While shaking my ass to George Michael's voice the entire way through this battle toward self-realization.

I dressed like Princess Leia for countless Halloweens and every day I could at school, to play "Star Wars" every recess with my best school friend Brian.

I never knew these people as people, but the loss of the artists who influenced me so profoundly still hurts like hell.

Darwin is snoring on the bed. P-Funk is gone, but I can still love those who are still here.

Hurts. Hurts to love. Hurts to care.
serafaery: (darkfaery)
Also I want to say that I am so fucking grateful to Trent for not losing ANY of his darkness - if anything it's increasing. This is so fucking needed, at this time. I am disappointed in other artists of this generation for losing some (but not all) of theirs. This is needed comfort. I credit Trent with sobriety, lack of offspring, and animal and environmental advocacy, for staying dark and staying awake and staying vital in this heaving wounded world.

serafaery: (darkfaery)
omg the soup is incredible. purple and sweet onion, sweet potatoes, purple and red potatoes, purple cabbage, pink and purple beets, parsnips, crimini mushrooms, carrots, fresh rosemary, sprinkle of tumeric, oregano, thyme and poultry seasoning, basil salt, pepper. holy balls this is tasty. It barely fit in the pot. Purple soup!

Kitty sleeping in a sunbeam on our bed, with a catnip banana for a pillow.



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