love.

watching narwal swim makes me sob because they are unspeakably beautiful and innocent and fragile, and I know they will all go extinct due to insatiable and unnecessary human waste and greed.

all of the most beautiful things are being permanently destroyed for no good reason, for no purpose. to no end but horror and pain and death.

I cannot enjoy the things I find most beautiful.

this is how death ideation strengthens.

..

(it might also have something to do with the fact that I have been in nonstop physical pain for several weeks.)