serafaery

I'm worthy of friends who treat me with kindness, understanding, patience, and affection. I know this because the best friends I have do just this for me, every day. I love them endlessly for it.

Kale with local sweet onion, garlic, dulce, purple and fingerling potatoes. Quinoa. Corn on the cob. This is a typical dinner for me. I am amazed at the wonderfulness of food.

I'm amazed at the wonderfulness of everything, today. Helpful physical therapy. My friends. My sweet cute healthy playful cat. A perfect latte. Savory treats. Melty soaky warm water happiness. Sunflowers bursting. Purple hair. Wings wings wings.

I want to glue my ears on now! But no. Not until Friday. Or my hair will turn them purple. (I sleep in them over the weekend at Faerieworlds. Spirit gum and liquid latex hold up surprisingly well, even through sleeping and showering.)

I'm oddly not the slightest bit stressed even though I'm very behind in what I wanted to get done by now. No point in stressing. I'm so happy just to go. And I'm happy to prepare calmly and slowly, enjoying each moment of the process, and the moments between.

Faerieworlds! Squeep!

Those who've faught harder battles than I could ever imagine, I love and admire and miss you so very much.

YouTube link of Eva singing.

Eva, beautiful beautiful Eva, died this morning.

It feels so empty, death. Like someone turning off a light.

It's so sad but I have to remember that I'm so very lucky that I ever stumbled upon her journal in the first place. I feel unworthy of the minuscule friendship she and I developed years ago - ashamed of taking even a moment of her thought and energy when she had so much else to do and such a short amount of time. She was 23. Would have been 24 on March 31st.

She has inspired me and honestly changed my life in a hugely positive way. My Gratitude Lists started in reaction to her bravery and spirit, the way she lived above petty concerns the rest of us have the luxury of debasing ourselves with, if we're not careful.

I'm more careful, to love and appreciate and enjoy life, in every moment, thanks to her.

...

This video was posted on her journal this evening with the following text:

"Eva receives the 2010 Summerhayes Award in room 450 at Vancouver General Hospital. Presented by Leona Pinsky and Sterling Aurel to honour Eva's work on behalf of the Canadian Cystic Fibrosis Foundation both in fundraising and CF awareness."

This is a movie that was just edited by Justin last night. We would like to share it because Eva states so eloquently her position on organ donation and Cystic Fibrosis awareness and that this will become such a major part of her legacy.

"Crows at sunset" (Watch on YouTube)

Preston sent me these last night, in the midst of tears and self-destructive thoughts. That boy saves my life on a regular basis. (Yes, it is this easy to pull me out of my depressive states. I must be getting better.)


Party cat:




Susej:

My darling beautiful glittering fire faery. Eva. Ay-vah. Beautifulbeautiful. Her life is art. Muse. Inspiration. Sparkles. So much love.

I have never met her. But she was with me on livejournal through the breakup with Preston and the discovery of a new kind of love with Myrrh, which she celebrated with me. She has been following my dreams and flitterings with an earnest interest and passion I've not yet come across in another person. She is truly fae, and so much more than that as well. I was, I am, intimidated by her, and a little ashamed of myself for that - for holding back a little, out of fear of her amazingness.

I love this girl. How can you not love this girl? She's startlingly beautiful in every way.

She creates and radiates the love of a thousand from her one fiery heart.



She is nearing the end of her life. But her love will burn on, through all of us, who will love her, always.

I don't want her to go.

Stayed home sick today. Had a miserable sore throat, headache, fatigue. I learned a long time ago that going to my particular job while sick is never, ever worth it.

Slept in late, gargled with salt water, took some asperin and tylenol, fed myself good food, went to coffee with Myrrh mid-day, stayed cool, did a little laundry, some dishes, napped, drank a lot of water, stayed away from sugar and alcohol, cuddled with the kitty, was very nice.

I feel about the same. Slightly more sniffly, less hot, more sand papery throat. Hopefully I'll feel better in the morning and will be able to go back to werk.

Glad it's so warm. Could walk around naked at midnight, perfectly comfortable. I love it. I cherish our brief, capricious summers.

* gentle warm morning in a cozy hoodie
* 7am Ristretto latte, with plenty of time to catch the bus
* Willow ate all her tuna water
* warm shower
* hemp milk and fortified cereal
* strangely delicious rosemary black plum
* early morning interactions, day flying by
* sushi for lunch, sesame seaweed salad
* toddy and iced vanilla latte treats w/ Chris at Barista
* leftover pizza from werk for dinner, complete with strawberry Hotlips soda
* an adorable bus ride companion, watching him bus surf
* Willow eating most of her wet food
* open mic at 3 Friends, artists, people, resonating, music and feathers and language
* iced black tea with mango, unsweetened and perfect
* found feathers
* doodling lines, fairies, feathers
* bananas
* spinning eggs (which one is boiled?)
* fish fly (what is it what is it?)
* crows, all at once (would make a good alarm sound)
* picking up the pedal
* got so much done today
* been up for 17 hours on six hours of sleep, feeling tired but okay
* warm warm sunlight
* glimpses of pink in the purply blue sky as light fades
* temporarily, briefly, in and a part of this beautiful world
* podcasts and pictures
* friendship and love too full to grasp
* get to sink into sleep cuddled up with a kitty

Warren Ellis posted Star St. Germain's drawing of herself and Myrrh on his blog this morning (which is mirrored here on livejournal: via warren_ellis).

So pretty! Myrrh plays with Star when he travels to San Francisco, and when Star isn't playing cello with Myrrh, she illustrates beautiful things, like this.