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I would recaption this: Things I've Spent a Lifetime Perfecting lol
a couple of additions though - I would say my self-assurance is pretty decent most of the time these days, but I will always, always need outside validation along with it. my boundaries are way better (but still need a lot more work), and although it's difficult, I can still find value in myself on non-productive days. I actually *enjoy* staying small to fit in and have no interest in changing that, nor do I mind sacrificing voice/beliefs to avoid conflict - if people wanted to know how I really felt, they wouldn't be mean about it. Standards of beauty is a tough one, I think age is just going to force me out of this on its own, eventually. Distraction and pretending, yeah, still dialed up to 11, this is fine lol.
a couple of additions though - I would say my self-assurance is pretty decent most of the time these days, but I will always, always need outside validation along with it. my boundaries are way better (but still need a lot more work), and although it's difficult, I can still find value in myself on non-productive days. I actually *enjoy* staying small to fit in and have no interest in changing that, nor do I mind sacrificing voice/beliefs to avoid conflict - if people wanted to know how I really felt, they wouldn't be mean about it. Standards of beauty is a tough one, I think age is just going to force me out of this on its own, eventually. Distraction and pretending, yeah, still dialed up to 11, this is fine lol.
