sunset walkies with audiobooks and birdsong

today was nice. ate too much but that's okay, i am so sore from running super hard at the track yesterday, and i worked, which always involves stress-eating, lately. a japanese matcha bun, a cheese and butter biscuit at the cafe, some yogurt covered pretzels, some plantain chips, nom nom nom. i was planning to fast today, whoops, lololol. i also had chicken and veggies and lots of fresh fruit and some oats and dark chocolate and lots of nuts. very serafaery foods.

it was nice to take a shower in the freshly clean shower stall/tub. was intending to take a bath last night, but lost the motivation to draw it.

still trying to pull out of this funk. i realized that the war is draining on me, it is no wonder i feel despondent about existence, lately. plus the physical pain of my foot, i know what pain does to my mood, after suffering for so many years with chronic hip pain from hip dysplasia and from chronic migraines from being poisoned by birth control for 27 years. that on top of being sober and going very low contact with my family is going to take a toll, it's understandable and it's okay.

fortunately, life is still wonderful in so many ways.

the spring weather is rainy and cold but with such bright, cheerful bursts of sunlight. the birds are so loud this year, the rhodies are popping.

my cat is forever and always happy.

i love my job and its gentle pace. it was so lovely to get to sparkle pamela today, and have such easy, delightful conversation with her.

i love that josh was kind and forgiving when i was short with him this morning. he is very understanding of the pressure i feel sometimes, the discomfort i feel when things aren't quite right in the mornings.

i love the high ceilings and big windows of this apartment. the general comfort of the space, despite its quirks and chronic chilliness since they disconnected us from the steam heat.

i love my baristas and coffeeshops.

the crows in my old neighborhood still remember me and fly overhead and land above me to ask for treats.

it's time for sunset walkies! i am so grateful that i have a lifestyle that allows such things.

just a silly thing

the racing company that puts on the majority of the runs that josh and i sign up for put out a flyer for an upcoming race at the coast that josh and i did the past two years, and a photo of me is featured that i haven't even seen, it made me lol to see it in my inbox, today.

i have a habit of getting very high from racing, so when i see the photog, i tend to strike ridiculous poses. plus, you know, i'm me, so i can't tone it down, outfit-wise.

so here is the silly photo of me on my bike during the "tour de pacific" bike tour last year, lol



the rabbit ears on my bike helmet are not special occasion ears or anything - that's just my helmet. all the time. (same with the flowers on my handlebars and bike basket - which yes is just a milk crate zip-tied on haha)