too sad.

[serafaery]

cried when i woke up this morning.

cried in therapy. therapist says if i have a downswing i can reach out to him between sessions and if he can, he will make time for me. not sure i will ever do that, but it was nice of him to offer.

i have downswings every day tho?

:(

spending the day with tyler tomorrow will help. i'm exhausted tonight, work and chores did me in, but i will try to get up early and get my hair dyed while i clean the kitchen and make lunch and wrap a lil gift for him. we are hoping to hit a few freebie birthday treats and get a hike in (silver star redux, perhaps)

here are a handful of photos from silver star on sunday. Josh in the background with his "fluffy flower" in one, Mt St Helens and Rainier in another.








Everyone is calling this "sub-alpine mariposa lily" this year but I learned it as "cat's ear mariposa" years ago and I'm sticking with my name lol

Comments

[canadiangirlgeek]

Beautiful photos <3

One day, we will not cry as much anymore. Until then, hang in there and be gentle with yourself. *sends kindness*

[decemberthirty]

Is that the beargrass you were talking about?? It looks EXACTLY like a plant that I know of as turkey beard that grows in New Jersey. They must be related!

I get excited about nature, but I don't intend to ignore the rest of your post too. I'm sorry you're feeling so sad. I hope it lifts for you.

[serafaery]

Thank you so much, doing my best with the self-kindness :) Hope you are too :)

[serafaery]

Thank you so much - I get sad so often but in the moment it feels so heavy, it never seems to get easier. Today is much better - Tyler and I had a lovely, loving, gentle day together.

Here is a google answer about turkey beard - short answer, they ARE related, you are right! :)

Turkey beard
.
(Xerophyllum asphodeloides) is the eastern species of bear grass, found in the southeastern United States.
Common Beargrass
.
(Xerophyllum tenax) is the western species of bear grass, found in the northwestern United States and Canada.
Beargrass - Discover Lewis & Clark
Both plants are in the lily family and have long, grass-like leaves, which is why they are called "bear grass". However, they have distinct geographic ranges and some minor differences in appearance.

[pantherinsnow]

That looks like paradise--such beautiful photos. I've never seen those flowers before, they're wonderful!