Mar. 9th, 2021

serafaery: (Default)
still avoiding everything.

one cool thing happened. i hopped on my bike to go to the grocery store, stopped at the bank for quarters first, and it started to rain. i hated it, usually i can tolerate light rain but i just couldn't stand it. i turned around to bike home, but then the thought of driving to the store seemed even worse than biking. so i turned back around toward the store. then i turned toward home again, then back to the store again. both options seemed equally unbearable but at least on my bike i wasn't polluting.

then i got behind this bike with a dude in a giant portland-weather-appropriate poncho (much smarter than me, who purposefully left my raincoat at home), with an adorable doggo in his bike basket, wearing goggles. bike dog basket guy and i stopped at a light, and he turned on music. specifically this song:



I stayed behind him just to listen to the song, it was so good. i could hear enough of the lyrics that i was able to search for it and find it when i got home.

so, that was a nice thing.

i regret not getting evening coffee, but i'm trying to protect my sleep better. so i'm drinking tea. i ate a bunch of sugar and i don't even care. it's okay to be sad and fail at everything for an evening or three.

i applied for an 8 year old black cat at the pound. his owner died. application got accepted and they want to do a phone interview. this would mean we can't have stanley over here to visit. but maybe i don't need a rescue pitbull one day a week who might want to eat my face if i piss him off. i dunno.
serafaery: (Default)
just not seeing a way out of this that is in any way good. getting more functional just means more pain later. i can only see things getting worse. just endlessly always a little bit worse, and a little bit worse, and a little bit worse. endlessly.

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serafaery

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