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foggy saturday
Dec. 23rd, 2023 05:36 pmNatasha doesn't want to give up Avalanche.
It's what I suspected. But it's still sad. Because it's the only cat Josh wants, which kind of means that if I don't get Avalanche, I don't get a cat.
Sigh.
I'm still thrilled to host them at least. I will sleep in the livingroom with them tonight.
I have to skate in two hours and I'm so exhausted. I got up early to try to get a lookout tower (no luck), went running, went to aerial with Josh and Natasha, went grocery shopping, and I just ate a bunch of veggies and avocado and hemp seeds and fruit and chocolate and am feeling extremely light-headed and dizzy even after the food.
Tried to make up an excuse to see Finley again but he deflected. Same with Tyler.
I think I'm just tired.
My hormones are doing flip-flops.
I'm giddy with relief and mild horror that I'm avoiding what's left of my family for xmas this year. It feels very strange and very liberating. I will go back, I just needed a break. I needed something different. I needed to be okay with things not being okay.
The fog this morning was so beautiful. A soft purpley-blue when the sun was coming up. The run in the park was so beautiful, the fog was just lifting and it was a nippy 35 degrees, but I was happy even though I was cold. I loved it. It's weird to love running. Josh is a good running partner. I have him to thank for this, and so many other things.
Ate too many gingerbread cookies today. I just want more. Maybe I'll make myself a bowl of whipped cream. I love whipping it myself and adding just a dash of mushroom infused honey. It makes my soul happy.
It's what I suspected. But it's still sad. Because it's the only cat Josh wants, which kind of means that if I don't get Avalanche, I don't get a cat.
Sigh.
I'm still thrilled to host them at least. I will sleep in the livingroom with them tonight.
I have to skate in two hours and I'm so exhausted. I got up early to try to get a lookout tower (no luck), went running, went to aerial with Josh and Natasha, went grocery shopping, and I just ate a bunch of veggies and avocado and hemp seeds and fruit and chocolate and am feeling extremely light-headed and dizzy even after the food.
Tried to make up an excuse to see Finley again but he deflected. Same with Tyler.
I think I'm just tired.
My hormones are doing flip-flops.
I'm giddy with relief and mild horror that I'm avoiding what's left of my family for xmas this year. It feels very strange and very liberating. I will go back, I just needed a break. I needed something different. I needed to be okay with things not being okay.
The fog this morning was so beautiful. A soft purpley-blue when the sun was coming up. The run in the park was so beautiful, the fog was just lifting and it was a nippy 35 degrees, but I was happy even though I was cold. I loved it. It's weird to love running. Josh is a good running partner. I have him to thank for this, and so many other things.
Ate too many gingerbread cookies today. I just want more. Maybe I'll make myself a bowl of whipped cream. I love whipping it myself and adding just a dash of mushroom infused honey. It makes my soul happy.
