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slow healing
Jun. 29th, 2024 11:25 amThese videos were off-putting to me at first because Heidi's presentation can be so unnatural/forced/robotic/stiff, but her actual information is extremely valuable and she presents it in a way that is really accessible to me.
I think this can act as a really nice supplement to the work I'm doing with my therapist. For instance, I was really put off by the way he was exploring my emotional block in the area of anger. I am completely closed off from that emotion. I hate it and don't feel I have the right to feel it. He thinks I need access to it. But I couldn't see the value in that. He said it is healing, but, how? It feels awful and doesn't ever solve anything I'd rather just not go there.
But Heidi added the point that everyone feels anger and it is a natural emotion and we need to get in touch with everything we feel if we are going to have a chance to heal, because if we close off entire parts of ourselves, we'll never resolve the deep sense of existential loneliness we feel due to being completely out of touch with core aspects of our being.
Anyway, I think I need to watch this video like ten times and take extensive notes. Same with the one I posted yesterday.
Because self-abandonment is such a deep part of who I am that I am still not sure who I would be without it. And I'm so tired of it.
I think this can act as a really nice supplement to the work I'm doing with my therapist. For instance, I was really put off by the way he was exploring my emotional block in the area of anger. I am completely closed off from that emotion. I hate it and don't feel I have the right to feel it. He thinks I need access to it. But I couldn't see the value in that. He said it is healing, but, how? It feels awful and doesn't ever solve anything I'd rather just not go there.
But Heidi added the point that everyone feels anger and it is a natural emotion and we need to get in touch with everything we feel if we are going to have a chance to heal, because if we close off entire parts of ourselves, we'll never resolve the deep sense of existential loneliness we feel due to being completely out of touch with core aspects of our being.
Anyway, I think I need to watch this video like ten times and take extensive notes. Same with the one I posted yesterday.
Because self-abandonment is such a deep part of who I am that I am still not sure who I would be without it. And I'm so tired of it.
