hypervigilance

[serafaery]

one thing about having had a lifetime of financial and emotional and spiritual pain and struggle is the constant anxiety that comes with an unforeseen secure and comfortable lifestyle. when is it going to all get ripped away, and how unprepared have i become for such an inevitable occurrence. goes the mind chatter. if i'm not grateful enough i will lose everything and end up in a soggy tent on the pavement. i will never really be good enough to be worthy of any of this.