serafaery

went to the store. was not fun. but got what i needed. all i want to do is read my new longevity book. i sort of lost interest in the unicorn dress. maybe after i pay state taxes, or restructure my investments, i dunno.

the oregonian sent me a copy of the obituary section from the day mom's was published, at my request. so kind of them to make sure i got that. it looks lovely. perfect, really. i'm grateful.

this heaviness of death all the time, with the backdrop of covid, and two big losses in the last year, mom and Madoc, has been tough, emotionally. crawling out of the depths, not sure how.

trying not to eat my feelings, it's really hard. i ate an entire pot of white rice earlier, it just tasted so wonderful. not a thing i usually want to eat at all. trying to get by with lemon ginger fizzy water for the rest of the night. need vampire show like whoah. but i'll do my unemployment claim first, maybe.

never went running. the weather is just too gross. i should have just toughed it out, i'd feel better if i had. oh well. work tomorrow will help shake me out of this mood a bit.

sia is still making me happy. fighting a sandstorm.