Truth vs fiction.

[serafaery]

“The idea that ancient women warriors (Amazons) removed their right breast to improve bow hunting is a myth, not a historical fact. The belief originated from a false Greek etymology interpreting "Amazon" as "without breast" (\(a\)- "without" + mazos "breast"), rather than from actual practices.”

Someone somewhere mentioned this as a true thing recently, while I’ve been processing a botched breast surgery that has left me disfigured.

There was a part of my brain that has been screaming ever since, please tell me no one would ever actually do that to themselves.


This is a Gemini answer but I still find it profoundly reassuring.

Comments

[tommx]

I've always know of this to be myth. It reminds me of a mis-translation in the Bible used to have people convinced that Jews had horns. I'm sorry if the person who thought it was true triggered you while you process what you're going through.

[serafaery]

Thanks thanks :) I'd never heard of it! It's been stressful, I know people are well-meaning but the impulse to describe something way worse than what I'm going through has been frustrating/invalidating, I know they aren't trying to upset me, quite the opposite, that's my own sensitivity I have to manage. I also know that many people do have their breasts fully removed, but as far as I know, that's because they have to protect their health, or for a gender-affirming need, and they are not doing in to their own body with a knife out in a jungle somewhere. No shame to anyone who augments their breasts for any reason. I just really needed to know that women weren't mutilating themselves for sport, I guess.

[tommx]

I know people are well-meaning but the impulse to describe something way worse than what I'm going through has been frustrating/invalidating

I never understood people who think that they're being helpful by doing that. My take is that when a friend is going through something difficult, it is best to listen more than you speak, and to be of actual service to that friend by asking what they actually need rather than making assumptions about what is best for them. It's also important to know that the answer "There's nothing you can do" or "I'd rather not talk about it right now" is entirely appropriate and should be respected. Suffice to way, invalidating someone's struggle by suggesting how much worse it could be is incredibly unhelpful.

[michaelboy]

I'm sorry you feel disfigured. Yet, I see so much more in who and what you are. I know it doesn't erase your feelings nor should it but I am so fortunate to know you as I do.

[keplers_angels]

It might have been me who mentioned that. I heard it somewhere (probably in one of my flattie groups on facebook) and it was such an affirming story that I didn't look into its veracity. (though if I'm remembering correctly: the time I wrote about this I questioned whether even *amazons actually existed so... )

I am curious now though... And I had no idea that "amazon" literally MEANS "breastless." That's incredible.... *makes note to go go down internet rabbit hole on this sometime soon*

I'm so sorry to hear your surgery went poorly --or looks bad-- that's dreadful. And I swear to gods (and amazons) that I spend half my life over the last three years ranting and raving on the facebook in hopes of preventing women from having these kinds of experiences. No one deserves to be left disfigured and when it comes to breasts... there is sooooo fucking much baggage, cultural and emotions, ... gender and sex and ... incompetent surgeons are enabled by the shame and anxiety women feel around their bodies and their breasts -- we're often afraid to speak up and complain and demand better, and the cycle just keeps cycling... <3 ... but sorry, I get ranting... Your experience is COMMON AS FUCK though -- if that is any consolation....

There ARE many qualified surgeons in the onco and plastic fields who know how to do these things properly and leave a beautiful result. They can take some finding. If you have anymore breast surgeries, I would be ecstatic, as I have mentioned before, to share resources with you.

[serafaery]

Hi hi, no worries, I couldn't remember who I just was randomly persistently bothered by it for some reason lol. Maybe in the distant past I learned that was wrong and needed to re-confirm, I dunno.

Yes I will definitely hit you up if I get to a place where I feel like I need to correct it. I'm not sure right now how to go about dealing with what happened. It's annoying af, that I was told specifically, repeatedly, that this would NOT happen, and that my surgeon is acting totally befuddled. I thought something was amiss when I woke up with her nowhere in sight, and my breast looked like this immediately, I just hoped once it healed it would get better since the dent was kind of right near where the steri-strips were. I just can't help but think she saw this too, but she acted like she's never seen my breast before when we reviewed it recently :( I don't like this behavior and I don't know how to proceed with dealing with it. I want to say something to the team but I don't know where to start. It's not like my health is at risk due to it, but it's also just really not right. :/

[keplers_angels]

notputtingonashirt.org has a list of recommended breast and plastic surgeons. The page and org is for flat closure with mastectomies specifically, however I'd be willing to bet any surgeon on that list would be well able to do a revision of some kind on a poorly closed lumpectomy. There are techniques. There are surgeons who actually know what they're doing.

The amount of shitty, and just uneducated surgeons performing breast surgeries and expecting their patients to accept ugly results is astronomical. But there are good ones out there, proving that it's possible and that we should expect to be treated (casually and medically speaking) better. This is seriously one of my major bete noires, and I'm remembering now that the post where I was talking about amazons, was a post ranting on exactly this thing --- making the point that if we did it to OURSELVES without any surgical know-how it would come out better than a lot of the qualified [sic] professionals out there.